His Blood Boils Like Mine

Yes, yes, yeeeessss!!!!! (Aaand, I'm spent).

Listen up, you Christo-Fascist bullies

Pat Robertson: Righter to Lif-- uhh...Death? Wait, what?

These are quite the family values: let's assassinate Chavez because, you know, we can. And it'd be cheap. And, most importantly...it wouldn't disrupt the flow of oil into God's Great Nation.

Televangelist Calls for Chavez' Death

So, Robertson is against abortion (because he sees it as murder) and for assassination of any world figure who dare speak out against the devastatingly inept Presidunce of 'Murika. Apparently, murder is okay, so long as Robertson hates the victim.

There can be no doubt (except, perhaps, in the minds of the insane) that the Reich's boy Pat is a psychopath.

Turning 'Murika into a Theocracy

Grooming Politicians for Christ

Nearly every Monday for six months, as many as a dozen congressional aides — many of them aspiring politicians — have gathered over takeout dinners to mine the Bible for ancient wisdom on modern policy debates about tax rates, foreign aid, education, cloning and the Central American Free Trade Agreement.

Because, as we all know, the Bible is abundantly clear and specific about where Christians should stand on the issues of cloning and the Central American Free Trade Agreement. Cloning and Central American trade were central themes in the New Testament book of "Oh-That's-Right-They-Weren't!".

Through seminars taught by conservative college professors and devout members of Congress, the students learn that serving country means first and always serving Christ.

They learn to view every vote as a religious duty, and to consider compromise a sin.

That puts them at the vanguard of a bold effort by evangelical conservatives to mold a new generation of leaders who will answer not to voters, but to God.

Greeeeat. Rather than do the will of the people (the very definition of representative democracy and the ONLY job our representatives should have) the future leaders of America are being trained to do the will of a fictional, psychopathic, invisible man in the sky.

You know...when David Berkowitz said his "high demon" neighbor sent him messages through his evil dog, society treated him appropriately. There seem to be some discrepant standards at work here. Or do we only trouble ourselves with categorizing as insane those who receive messages to do physical harm (as opposed to just wrecking democracy) from hallucinations?

The most prominent is Patrick Henry College in Purcellville, Va., an hour's drive from the capital. The college was founded five years ago with the goal of turning out "Christian men and women who will lead our nation with timeless biblical values."

Timeless Biblical values. Like the abomination of eating shellfish? Or of murdering aldulteresses...but not adulterers? Or of devaluing the lives of women when compared to men? Or of slaughtering the women and children of one's enemies? Or the prohibition against...shaving? Timeless, indeed.

As Kennedy put it: "If we leave it to man to decide what's good and evil, there will be chaos."

Chaos...yes, I've heard of this. Ah yes, like in Iraq! Where BushCo has arbitrarily decided that it's "good" of us to murder and maim the brown-skinned people indiginous to the oil-rich region and "evil" of them to try to defend themselves. Or how about in the old testament where it was -- and, because the values in the Bible are "timeless", still is -- good to turn your daughters over to be gang raped by a mob (Gen 19:5-8) and bad to, oh I don't know, befriend someone who believes in a different (or no) god than you (Ex 23:32-33).

The seminars proved a revelation. In one, Greene learned that ministers ran many of America's earliest schools. He hadn't thought much...

(oops...sorry! I guess there was more to that statement -- although
there shouldn't have been!)

...about education policy before that class. Now he plans to fight for history lessons on the Founding Fathers' faith, science lessons drawn from the Book of Genesis and public school prayer.

I'm sorry...science lessons drawn from the Book of Genesis?? I guess I was right: he doesn't think much! Here's another revelation: many of the Founding Fathers weren't Christian! ~gasp~

"It's one thing to have a [biblically inspired] position on one or two issues," said Greene, 26, who was wearing a wristband printed with the slogan "Jesus Is My Homie." "This class has you look deeper. It gives you an intellectual consistency."

That's true! Fundie Bonk Jobs are typically devoid of all intellect. And that's about as consistent as one can get.

Wait a minute...is a white guy really wearing a bracelet that makes reference to the term "homie"? ~sigh~

On this night, the topic was bioethics. As the students unwrapped deli sandwiches and brownies, prominent bioethicist Nigel M. deS. Cameron praised them for thinking about the "great questions of the day" through the prism of faith.

Note to LA Times editor: "prison" was mispelled in that last sentence.

Too often, he added — to a few startled looks — "Christians are not noted for using their brains."

The nerve! Boy, it takes moxy to pretend to be surprised that we notice they don't use their brains.

In an hourlong lecture, Cameron argued that Christians must move beyond denouncing abortion to see the "moral outrage" in other common practices, such as paying Ivy League students to donate eggs in the quest for a perfect baby."

Taking human life made in God's image may not be as bad, from God's point of view, as making human life in your own image," said Cameron, a professor at Chicago-Kent College of Law. "Our humanity, warts and all, is what we have been given to steward. It's not to be manipulated."

That's right! We're evil, snivelling worms deserving of the worst kind of punishment for behaving in a manner...well, uh...you know, consistent with our nature. How dare we strive to end the human suffering that a loving(?) god has inflicted upon us!

When Cameron called for questions, one student tentatively raised his hand to ask about embryonic stem cell research — specifically, the use of "spare" embryos, frozen in fertility clinics. "Under current practice, they're going to be discarded" unless they're used for research, he said. "What do we say about that, as Christians?"

Typical of Christians. Can't think for themselves. They need the comfort of an authority figure telling them what's right and wrong, what to believe and what to condemn.

"They're going to die anyway, right?" he said, indignant. "We don't apply the same principle to death row inmates. They're going to die anyway, so why can't we get some use out of them? We'd be able to do some fascinating experiments."

Ah, sarcasm! A higher form of communication. Wait, I'm confused.

"The principle of manipulating human life to get experimental benefit," Cameron said, "that is a very, very serious line to cross."

Alright then, fine. No medicine for Mr. Cameron. Let him pray for a cure when he gets the clap from one of the hookers he visits. And nothing for his ailing parents or his sick kids. Gotta have the courage on one's convictions, you know? (How much ya wanna bet Mr. Cameron takes full advantage of every benefit modern medicine -- much of which is based on human experimentation -- has to offer?)

"If you're clinging to conservatism just because you like conservatism, you don't put yourself on the line for your beliefs," Stacey said. "Your positions need to come from something deeper and more meaningful."

Like the irrational belief in an invisible man in the sky!

That message (of the Christian Reich) resonates with Jessica Echard, 23, who completed the Statesmanship Institute last year.

Growing up in rural West Virginia...

Well color me shocked!!

Now the director of the Eagle Forum, a conservative lobbying group founded by Phyllis Schlafly, Echard says Jesus would approve of a call for lower taxes: "God calls on us to be stewards of our [own] money."

Really?? What ever happened to Jesus' "render unto Caesar..."?

Appropriately,

(Roller) ended the recent class on bioethics with a plea: "(Invisible man in the sky), we pray you will help us to know how we should respond to these issues."

The (automotons) answered as one: "Amen."

US Battles for Theocracy

Draft Constitution May Strip Iraqi Women of Basic Human Rights

Iraq's parliament received a draft of the country's constitution... The document stipulates Islam is the official religion of Iraq, and is a fundamental source for legislation.

U.S. officials reportedly played a major role in the drafting of the document. Monday's outcome was welcomed in Washington. In a written statement, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said, "The process by which Iraqis have reached this point is historic and in the best tradition of democracy."

Ummm...what universe am I in, please? I thought we were over there fighting for "freedom and democracy" (that is, after every other excuse BushCo gave for its war was proven to be a lie -- Iraq is a world threat, has WMDs, played a part in 9/11, is linked to al Qaeda). Since when is a theocracy in the best tradition of democracy?? Oh. Wait. I forgot. These are the same fuck-tards who want to turn our own "democracy" (it's actually an oligarchy) into a theocracy.

Violent Reich Wing Outraged by...Cartoon Violence

This is too funny! WingNutDaily is foaming at the mouth...again.

"With its latest marketing gimmick … Planned Parenthood is glamorizing violence against people of faith," Sedlak said in a statement.

But wait...aren't Muslims "people of faith"? And isn't the United States (gawd bless 'murikka!) currently glamorizing violence against Muslim people of faith in Abu Graib, Guantanamo Bay, and in the streets of most major cities in Iraq? I believe the answers are 'yes' and 'yes'. So shut the hell up about 'glamorizing violence against people of faith' you Reich Wing hack. Your whiny, mysoginistic, ill-informed opinion isn't welcome in the real world.

"In this post-9/11 era of terrorism, Planned Parenthood has recklessly crossed the line by promoting violence against people who do not share the organization's radical beliefs," said Sedlak.

Fecking Jaysus, these people will pimp 9/11 for anything! And since when do women's health rights and equality constitute radical beliefs??! Time for a reality check, Sedlak.

"Planned Parenthood's actions are reprehensible, because there is no guarantee that someone viewing this video might not act on its suggestions and instigate violence against people of faith."

It's a cartoon for chrissake. anyone disturbed enough to think that watching a cartoon means they should physically assault another person is probably already a Reich Winger (these are the same people who say that without the punitive hand of gawd ahhmightee keeping their deviant tendancies in check, they'd be out raping and pillaging and murdering) and isn't going to the see the cartoon anyway. For those of us who know the difference between reality and not-reality...it's just a cartoon.

"This video is absolutely outrageous," said Douglas R. Scott, president of Life Decisions International, in a statement. "Pro-life men and women are depicted as evil and stupid."

No comment.

"It sends a message to teenagers that it is acceptable to eliminate those who disagree."

Betcha I can find a passage or two in the Bible that send the exact same message! (Try Ex 22:20 to start). But of more urgent concern, don't teenagers get that very same message from our actions in the Middle East (actions which are supported by a majority of anti-abortionists??)

"It is also riddled with misinformation about birth control, abortion, and sexual activity."

Oh. Yeah. As opposed to the shining beacons of truth put forth by the anti-abortion clan? Truths such as claiming that condoms can't reduce the spread of STDs including AIDS? Something tells me the anti-abortion crowd need look no further than its own camp to find misinformation about birth control, abortion, and sexual activity.

American Life League wants heads to roll over the video.

That's an interesting turn of phrase, considering that their complaint is that the cartoon promotes violence.

Said Sedlak: "American Life League demands that Planned Parenthood publicly reveal the names of all persons involved in the development and posting of this outrageous material..."

Why?? So that the Reich Wing's snipers and foot soldiers like Eric Rudolph can get to the business of doing "the good lawd's work"?

Slick Rick the Ideologue

Jon Stewart had Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Obviously) on The Daily Show last week. I choked down as much of his hateful, closed-minded vitriol as I could but ended up fast forwarding through the last half of the interview to save what little sanity I have left. The primary reason he was on the show was to hawk his latest literary raving: It Takes a Family: Conservatism and the Common Good.

I was hoping for a better dissection of Santorum's ideology but Stewart either has too much compassion and decency, or not enough balls, to properly tear into Santorum. Anyway, the rebuttal of Santorum's points I was hoping for can be found by following this link, which contains a complete unraveling of the whole premise of Rick "Frothy" Santorum's book. I remember yelling at the TV how Santorum had no fucking clue what would constitute -- based upon actual history rather than some Reich Wing eutopian dream -- a "traditional" family or the "values" thereof and it turns out I was right. (I knew I was).

Mmmm...Morford

Who Loves Creepy Megachurches?

But you really don't need to attend one of these surreal spectacles to realize that most of us should kneel down right now in heartfelt gratitude that we have never been forced to endure, say, the all-paunchy-married-male revue of a Promise Keepers rally, or the bizarre pious cheerleading of a Harvest Crusade in L.A., and hence we have been blessedly devoid of the taint of guys like Greg Laurie, one of the new breed of sleek preening pastors, a strange new mutant species of pastor-CEO-huckster-salesman, who leads the big Harvest chant-alongs and who writes milky best-selling self-help books, books that claim to know something of God but that somehow never mention single-malt scotch or anal sex or Tom Waits or grinning Buddha icons or chocolate ice cream drizzled on a lover's tailbone, slowly, tantalizingly. Greg. Sweetheart. You so don't know God. I'm just sayin'.

Similar Sentiments

David Podvin and I must be cut from the same cloth:

With the political news being so relentlessly depressing, many liberals seek solace by watching beautiful sunsets or listening to great music or reading fine literature. I'm not quite so pretentious. I get off on seeing conservatives unhappy. No bleeding heart liberal here. I revel in their pain. The more misery they incur, the sunnier my disposition. Contemptible, isn't it? I almost feel guilty.

Please read the rest: Shadenfreude

Presidunce Bush Confirms Status as Idiot...Yet Again

Unintelligent president endorses teaching 'intelligent design,' defends Roberts and Rove — then leaves for another month-long vacation

Bush said he has no idea how Supreme Court nominee John G. Roberts would vote in a case challenging the legality of abortion because he never asked him about it.

BULLSHIT!!! Regardless of whether or not he actually asked him about it, Bush would never have appointed Roberts without knowing for sure that he was no friend of Roe v. Wade.

"I think that part of education is to expose people to different schools of thought," Bush said. " You're asking me whether or not people ought to be exposed to different ideas (actually, they were asking if you though ID should be taught in public schools...don't change the question, just answer it), the answer is yes."

That's an unusual statement coming from the least informed, least intelligent president the country has ever seen. He thinks people should be exposed to different schools of thought as part of becoming educated? Okay. Then how about teaching Satanism -- as an opposing view with equal validity -- alongside Christianity in church? Oh wait, that's right...going to church has nothing to do with education. Alright then, how about this? How about the theory (actually reality, backed by evidence) that Iraq was never a threat to the U.S., did not have WMD, and had no ties to al Qaeda. Hmm? What do you say to that, Mr. Let's-look-at-all-sides-except-the-ones-that-don't-give-me-my-war?

"The claim that equity demands balanced treatment of evolutionary theory and special creation in science classrooms reflects a misunderstanding of what science is and how it is conducted," the academy said in a 1999 assessment. "Creationism, intelligent design, and other claims of supernatural intervention in the origin of life or of species are not science because they are not testable by the methods of science."

Now...isn't that one of the most sussinct, clear statements of the whole situation you've ever heard? It doesn't get any more simple than that.

...advocates of intelligent design also claim support from scientists. The Discovery Institute, a conservative think tank in Seattle that's the leading proponent for intelligent design, said it has compiled a list of more than 400 scientists, including 70 biologists, who are skeptical about evolution."

First off, it just makes my skin crawl every time the name of our progressive city is drug through the mud by the mere association with an organization as backward thinking as The "Discovery" Institute. And second, what are they "discovering"? Their own assholes? Because they're certainly not discovering reality!

The fact is that a significant number of scientists are extremely skeptical that Darwinian evolution can explain the origins of life," John West, associate director of the organization's Center for Science and Culture, said in a prepared statement.

400 scientists the world over is considered "a significant number" by these idiots?? No wonder they fail to grasp real science.

(Bush) also offered an unequivocal defense of Palmeiro, a friend from their days together with the Texas Rangers in the early 1990s. Bush was the team's managing partner when Palmeiro played in Texas.

The Orioles slugger was suspended for 10 days after testing positive for steroid use, despite his insistence that he never intentionally used the prohibited substance. ("I, uhh, fell on the needle! Yeah, that's it, I fell on a needle full of steriods...on a regularly scheduled basis. It was completely unintentional"). Bush has been an outspoken critic of steroid abuse.

"Rafael Palmeiro is a friend. He testified in public and I believe him," Bush said, referring to Palmeiro's denials under oath to a congressional committee on March 17. "He's the kind of person that's going to stand up in front of the klieg lights and say he didn't use steroids, and I believe him. Still do."

So on the one hand you have Bush' good friend Raffy-boy swearing (lying) that he's clean and on the other hand you have reality. Which does Bush choose to go with? Fantasy. Just like everything else; Social Security, the war in Iraq, faith based initiatives, evolution, global warming (reality-based science, in general), and on and on.

Let's see...Palmeiro testifies to a congressional committee on steroid use in MLB (why Congress was involved when there were, and still are, much bigger scandals going on in the White House is beyond me) that he never used steroids...and then tests positive. He's rich and he's a liar. Of COURSE Bush and ol' Raffy-boy are friends! To paraphrase a pick-up line from Beavis and Butt-head, "..you're rich, I'm rich...you're a liar, I'm a liar..." Also, Bush's complete disconnect between fantasy and reality ties back in with his position on creationism, global warming, Social Security and the war on terror -- sorry, the "global struggle against violent extremism" -- to name just a few.

Bush, who leaves Tuesday for a monthlong stay at his Texas ranch, took questions from five Texas reporters at a conference table in the Roosevelt Room, just off the Oval Office. Looking relaxed and upbeat, he sipped on cola and chewed ice as he answered, deflected or bantered his way through questions on a host of topics.

Oh. Yeah. Isn't the Presidunce just the epitome of everything a world leader should be! Hiding out, yucking it up with a hand picked gaggle of home-team reporters, getting ready for A MONTH LONG VACATION, amidst a crumbling economy, a looming oil crisis and global attacks which are the direct result of his own ineptitude. Jesus H. Christ, we are so fucked...