Second Presidential Debate

The second presidential debate.

BUSH: Two days ago in the Oval Office, I met with the finance minister from Iraq. He came to see me. And he talked about how optimistic he was and the country was about heading toward elections.

Think about it: They're going from tyranny to elections.

He talked about the reconstruction efforts that are beginning to take hold. He talked about the fact that Iraqis love to be free.

He said he was optimistic when he came here, then he turned on the TV and listened to the political rhetoric and all of a sudden he was pessimistic.

Translation: We were feeding him the same alternate reality, things-in-Iraq-are-great slop that we dine on every morning. And all was well. Then he turned on the TV and got himself a nice dose of reality.

BUSH: He (Kerry) talks about a grand idea: Let's have a summit; we're going to solve the problem in Iraq by holding a summit.

And what is he going to say to those people that show up at the summit? Join me in the wrong war at the wrong time at the wrong place. Risk your troops in a war you've called a mistake.

Nobody is going to follow somebody who doesn't
believe we can succeed and with somebody who says that war where we are is a mistake.

Actually, I think Kerry will just say to the rest of the world, "Hey, now that we've got that fuck-wit out of the White House, let's fix his screw-ups, okay? Instead of giving every penny of reconstruction money to Halliburton, the U.S. will include all of you. No "with us or against us" rhetoric, just "let's make this right".

Bush: I know how these people think. I meet with them all the time. I talk to Tony Blair all the time. I talk to Silvio Berlusconi. They're not going to follow an American president who says follow me into a mistake.

Don't forget Poland! You forgot Aleksander Kwasniewski of Poland! Anyway...I think Bush means again. They won't follow an American president into a mistake again. They did it once a year and a half ago. They won't do it again.

Washington: What is your plan to repair relations with other countries given the current situation?

Bush: (I'm paraphrasing here) Well, I've pissed off a lot of people in Europe over the war in Iraq, over the Isreali/Palestine conflict, and over the International Criminal Court. I did things that weren't popular among European nations, but I stuck with my choices in spite of that.

Ummm, yeah. We know you screwed up and pissed off most of the world. Where again was the plan to REPAIR relations with the world?

Bush: That's why I'm a big proponent of clean coal technology, to make sure we can use coal but in a clean way.

Ever hold a piece of coal in your hand? Yeah. It's real clean stuff.

Bush: I guess you'd say I'm a good steward of the land.

Dear reader, I hope you hadn't just taken a big swig of something to drink just then, or it's likely all over the monitor now!

BUSH: The quality of the air's cleaner since I've been the president. Fewer water complaints since I've been the president.

That wouldn't have anything to do with having gutted the EPA, would it? Or with lowering the bar on what consitutes dangerous levels of toxins in the air and water? Or with allowing the very industries that do the polluting to decide what are appropriate levels of pollution?

BUSH: Let me start with how to control the cost of health care: medical liability reform...

Umm, yeah. With the cost of liability suits resulting in only 1% of the overal cost of the medical industry? That's a smart plan. Sounds like Boeing focusing on trimming Engineering costs when Engineering is only 3% of the cost of a new airplane program. Wouldn't it be wiser to focus on something that could actually make a dent in the cost of health care? Oh, wait. That wouldn't protect the profit margins of Bush's friends in the healthcare industry, so that obviously can't work.

Bush: This is different from saying, "OK, let me incent you to go on the government."

Asssphinctersayswhat??

FOWLER: President Bush, 45 days after 9/11, Congress passed the Patriot Act, which takes away checks on law enforcement and weakens American citizens' rights and freedoms, especially Fourth Amendment rights.

With expansions to the Patriot Act and Patriot Act II, my question to you is, why are my rights being watered down and my citizens' around me? And what are the specific justifications for these reforms?

BUSH: I appreciate that.

I really don't think your rights are being watered down. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't support it if I thought that.

As a matter of fact, the tools now given to the terrorist fighters are the same tools that we've been using against drug dealers and white-collar criminals.

And we all know how well the war on drugs and the war against white-collar crime (oh, hello Mr. Lay! You're not in prison?) is going. So much for the effectiveness of the PATRIOT ACT and the PATRIOT ACT II. NEXT!

Bush: So I really don't think so. I hope you don't think that. I mean, I -- because I think whoever is the president must guard your liberties, must not erode your rights in America.

Oh my, he really is living in some wierd alternate reality.

MICHAELSON: Mr. President, if there were a vacancy in the Supreme Court and you had the opportunity to fill that position today, who would you choose and why?

I really don't have -- haven't picked anybody yet. Plus, I want them all voting for me.
(LAUGHTER)

You know, just like they did in 2000! That's a hillarious frickin' joke. Har-dee-har-harrr.

Bush: I would pick somebody who would not allow their personal opinion to get in the way of the law.

Let me give you a couple of examples, I guess, of the kind of person I wouldn't pick.

I wouldn't pick a judge who said that the Pledge of Allegiance couldn't be said in a school because it had the words "under God" in it. I think that's an example of a judge allowing personal opinion to enter into the decision-making process as opposed to a strict interpretation of the Constitution.

So one opinion ("under God" should stay) is acceptable, but another ("under God" should go) isn't? I thought personal opinion wasn't supposed to come in to play.

BUSH: Another example would be the Dred Scott case, which is where judges, years ago, said that the Constitution allowed slavery because of personal property rights.

That's a personal opinion. That's not what the Constitution says. The Constitution of the United States says we're all -- you know, it doesn't say that. It doesn't speak to the equality of America.

What?

And so, I would pick people that would be strict constructionists. We've got plenty of lawmakers in Washington, D.C. Legislators make law; judges interpret the Constitution.

WTF?? Constructionist judges?

Bush: And that's the kind of judge I'm going to put on there. No litmus test except for how they interpret the Constitution.

And also no litmus text except on how they would vote on Roe v. Wade (overturn it) and how they would vote regarding gay marriage (against) and how they would vote on "under God" (for it). In other words, they should be Fundamentalist Christian activist judges. Ooo, damn it! That was supposed to be an in-my-head thought. Crap!

BUSH: In other words, if you're a mom and you're pregnant and you get killed, the murderer gets tried for two cases, not just one.

You mean the suspect gets tried, don't you, Mr. Bush? Innocent until proven guilty and all?

KERRY: Well, again, the president just said, categorically, my opponent is against this, my opponent is against that. You know, it's just not that simple. No, I'm not.

I'm against the partial-birth abortion, but you've got to have an exception for the life of the mother and the health of the mother under the strictest test of bodily injury to the mother.

KERRY: Secondly, with respect to parental notification, I'm not going to require a 16-or 17-year-old kid who's been raped by her father and who's pregnant to have to notify her father. So you got to have a judicial intervention. And because they didn't have a judicial intervention where she could go somewhere and get help, I voted against it. It's never quite as simple as the president wants you to believe.

GIBSON: And 30 seconds, Mr. President.

BUSH: Well, it's pretty simple when they say: Are you for a ban on partial birth abortion? Yes or no? And he was given a chance to vote, and he voted no. And that's just the way it is. That's a vote. It came right up. It's clear for everybody to see.

Once again, the Imbecile-in-Chief completely misses the mark. Didn't Kerry just say he was against "partial-birth" abortions? Why, yes! Yes, he did! But he voted against the ban and against the parental notification because it didn't protect the pregnant woman to the extent that she ought to be protected. There's a difference between being against abortion and being against a law with so many riders and provisions as to distort the issue almost completely!